IPA Street Photography Asia Award 2013 Winners

In The Dark

Mortality is not the end of life. As we know it, it's all how you live. Or as I recently learnt from Steve Jobs, it's how you build your life.

Life is full of storms. Some loom large and threaten to blow everything away. Some loom far but don't get close enough. Some brew quietly inside, not visible from without but surely it spins and whirls--demand a real effort to tame it.

There're also moments when the lights seem to go out. And you panic. Perspire. Plead for help. Yet in that moment, perhaps a voice tells you to try. You're in the right place. And step by step, things will fall in place.

Who's to say you're on the right track? Shouldn't each of us be the best judge of that? Maybe not right away, but eventually yes?

Money and the lack thereof

Whatever amount we have, I think the heart of the attitude is really about having contentment.

As Paul says in Philippians 4:12,

I know how to live in poverty or prosperity. No matter what the situation, I've learned the secret of how to live when I'm full or when I'm hungry, when I have too much or when I have too little. (GWT)

Beyond basic needs, can I say that everything else becomes relative? And in crowded SG, driven by competition?

Where does contentment come from? Why are some more generous than others? Maybe it's simply learning to have enough, to enjoy life wherever we are, whatever we have, whoever we're with.

Now, I know comparison with others and focusing on things we don't have always highlight one's lack. But surely we've to remind ourselves that net worth don't determine a person's self-worth.

And if we keep focusing on our needs, whether present or future, we'll never feel we've enough. There's always something that requires money.

Can we simply learn to make the most of what we have? If we prosper, then enjoy the moment. If we don't, well, make do and be happy.

That's right, be happy.

Pursuing

There is talent, there is hard work and then there is luck. I believe in the luck that comes in the form of favour and opportunity. To make the most of these, one needs an attitude that is hopeful, positive and values networking.

Now, would others around describe you as one who pursues his dreams and priorities?

Pursuit demands energy--relentless--and sweeping aside anything that can distract or detract.

Love-like

In all of us, there is a need to relate, to connect & to feel loved & accepted. A hole in the soul results from a deficit of these--even the perception of it. A hole that, if it is not mended, will eat on the inside.

When a person reaches out but fails to connect, it's disappointing. But when a person finds not connection but exploitation, the sense of betrayal swells and engulfs. Because now the other person saw you for who you are, your vulnerable core. And now, loss, isolation & darkness ensues.

All is not hopeless. Life is not loveless. One has to hold on to this.

Perhaps it's that, even if we are carrying our own weight, the act of lightening's others' would lighten our own. Is it because it sets things in perspective? It takes the focus off yourself?

Whatever it is, we can all afford to connect. More. Deeply.

Come Running Back To YOU

Spurts of Intense Work

Perhaps it's time to do challenging work first thing in your day. Don't be afraid to try it. Make it a habit, so it becomes ingrained. This is towards becoming more effective and to grow in taking on bigger challenges.

http://dealbook.nytimes.com/2013/07/19/how-interval-training-can-make-you-incredibly-efficient-at-work/

Venus the Bringer of Peace

Time Off

Would you quit your job to do what you always wanted to do? Such as spending a year living in the Arctic Circle, enjoying time with yourself and your family?

This man did. Arctic Dream | Our Family's One-Year Adventure Living on an Arctic Island http://arcticdream.me/

Success isn't money, fame or influence (nothing wrong with these in themselves though). Success ought to be what really matters...to you.

Crepuscular

Bubbling

Arms straining at the effort, he tried to keep up with the swimmer ahead. Take a break? He asked himself. At the turn, his left calf tightened nearly to a cramp. Keep going, determination said.

Just an hour ago, the sky was arrayed in glorious orange-red. Barely anyone remarked on it, but surely all saw it.

One man asked another how his run was. A few sentences later, the other said goodbye and hauled himself out of the waters, now clear & placid.

Looking Beyond

Eric Schmidt of Google reports this of The New Digital Age:

• In Kenya, Maasai nomads live without home electricity or running water nonetheless pay for items with their mobile devices.
• In North Korea, citizens risk their lives and harsh punishment in order to obtain smuggled phones and tablets and take an even greater risk to venture close to the Chinese border so they can capture a signal.
• In Pakistan, we met a group of women who were attacked by the Taliban with acid. Their physical scars carry an unfair stigma that makes it hard for them to find work, but the Internet allows them to run businesses and interact with the world despite these challenges.
• In Iraq, following the return of looted artifacts, we were able to put the entire museum online so the world could experience the country's rich history.

Things that people of the developed, connected world take for granted are being fought for and relished in less privileged regions.

Will getting the world all wired up make it flatter, more connected & consuming more resources? Yet social, cultural & financial divides will surely persist.

Desperate for YOU

Hope & Future

Standing for what you believe in. Knowing you can accomplish something of worth.

Affirmation from people certainly help. But it's the self-belief that matters most. What you are capable of, not in another's shadow, but to be your own.

Acknowledging you're not perfect, so slips & setbacks do occur. But keep pushing on. Because you can do it. Because you do believe in that one thing.

Who matters to you? Pay attention to them. That's what you'll find rewarding.

Be hopeful. Things will work out for the better.

Currently reading

"Heart, Smarts, Guts and Luck (HSGL) is the result of research started in 2009 on what really makes entrepreneurs and business-builders tick."

Lunacy

When accused, confronted and cornered, how does one react? When outnumbered?

No one is perfectly good...everyone has faults and vulnerabilities. Is someone beckoning us to live as a good man?

Is it fear that drives us? Woe be the one who doesn't see it. Or is it desperation that grips us?

There comes a time when each is put to the trial, tested for what he is inside. While we realize it, hopefully we're given time to love and accept who we really are, and also examine areas that are lacking.

Now, what measure? Whose and how do we apply? Surely we just want to live a life well-lived. Even well-remembered.

No man will live for a lie. Neither will he stand to live for one.

Confront & Embrace

Recently I read about phantom limb syndrome, a peculiar & painful phenomenon where the affected person still feels sensations in his missing limb. Supposedly, the loss of a limb causes neurons to stop firing signals originating from it, so the synaptic firing should be silent, yet somehow the continued firing of synapses from surrounding neurons manages to convince the brain that the missing limb is sending out sensations.

The key question really ought to be: How do you resolve this syndrome of feeling something that by right should not be there? How do you initiate change in the direction of complete healing & emotional restoration?

We all want to get on with life, no matter what it deals at us. And definitely it helps immensely to have God on your side.

But first, you gotta confront what ails you. Identify it, whatever it is, and decide how you're gonna deal with it. Stab it in the foot, if that's what it takes! Keep hoping and going.

Then embrace the change you've selected. Will it work out for good? There's only one way to find out. If it doesn't, then just try another path, another method.

Make the most of what you have, who you have and when you have. You can do it.

Holding On

By Hoang Hiep Nguyen (Sony World Photography Awards)

Dancing

Who knows what might come your way if you'd just try?

Everyone's got his/her own hangups, screwups, muckups. Life seems to deal us blows in the gut. But you know what? You just move on.

Groove!

Divine Lady

Stepping Forward

If you want to move forward, well...take a step. Everything else will fall in place.

Adventure.

I remember telling a friend years ago after hearing an inspiring message, "Let's get ready for an adventure!"

Certainly spiritual, but also definitely in this world and in this time.

Getting to our God-outlined destination, not by our own route but surely by our steps, guided and sometimes redirected.

I suppose the adventure comes from being willing to simply get out, experiencing things you never thought you would--some bruising, some elating--and discovering more of yourself, God and this world along the way.

Letting it die. The past? The darkness that grips you? Mistakes, missteps, misbehaviours?

If it don't die, then you can't live. Live out loud, that is.

What's in your heart, go out and accomplish it. Even if you aren't sure what it is, go out anyway.

The sun will shine through. Yes it ultimately will. Stormy times, dark times, testing times... Whatever. It will end.

So keep stepping forward. You're one step closer already!

Making Room

Need breathing space?

Beneath the bustle, we have priorities that beckon to be met. While we truly want them to be met, sometimes we just don't.

Routines and obligations keep us from doing so, but that isn't how it should be.

Make room in your daily schedule, so you can breathe easier. So that not only do you fit in the things that matter, but really do focus on them and well, allow them time to likewise breathe into your life.

Does family matter to you? Friends? Personal happiness? Does money/career/things really mean more to you than these?

It will feel uncomfortable to make adjustments. So might it be worthwhile?

I think it will.

Loved

Loved

The truth is every one of us wants to love and be loved.

We are moved by scenes of couples getting together, getting married, families enjoying time together.. In real life or in drama.

How do we know he or she is the one? How do we know our future with our loved ones will last and will work out for the best? How do we know relationships and friendships will last?

By faith, that's the answer.

Brian Eno: Three Variations on Pachelbel's Canon

Quiet In A Noisy World

Reading Susan Cain's Quiet is plenty enlightening and assuring. If you simply understand and are at peace with how your introverted self thinks, behaves and instinctively responds, then you're more likely to find balance in this hyper-connected social time we live in.

Why does an introvert usually shun social gatherings, novel situations and even just getting out of the house? One, he is highly reactive and sensitive to his environment. Feeling things more deeply, he can be overly stimulated and more exhausted. Another thing is that he prefers meaningful relationships and thinking more deeply about things. Perhaps he hasn't learnt to interact and speak up with multiple parties at once, and doesn't like being labelled anti-social. At the very least, he prefers friendly and cooperative group settings.

Can an apparently extroverted person actually be introverted within? Yes, as he has learnt to project such a persona, whether motivated by work obligations or a cause he passionately pursues. He is usually highly observant and empathic, even towards a group audience. This is however demanding and energy-sapping for him, that's why he's got to find "restorative niches" to recharge himself.

He could even make a great leader. Because he is astute, listens well, takes carefully calculated risks, is persistent, and probably appreciates how other introverts operate and will afford them the space they need to thrive. Many fine examples stand out in human history, belied by whatever front we remember of them: the fiery, oratorical sort; the unassuming, behind-the-scenes worker; or the powerful, letter-writing influencer.

Coming to a place of self-awareness and self-acceptance is definitely key to finding personal happiness in what he does for a living, how he manages his time and energy everyday, how he complements and makes compromises with his life partner, how he deals with conflicts and stressful situations etc. Otherwise when confronted and overwhelmed by fear, guilt or anxiety that is triggered by others voicing their criticism or venting their anger, he shuts down his natural empathy and becomes avoidant.

Well, the world needs both introverts and extroverts, Cain reiterates in her book. And they both need each other. The extrovert very well seeks meaningful lifelong relationship which he finds possible with an introvert. The introvert finds conversation with the extrovert easy and interesting. Effective, well-considered decisions are made with the inputs of both achievement-oriented and properly analyzed views.

Learning all this makes me feel more at peace and hopeful of applying myself well in life. It's timely because I'm realising that my priorities include paying attention to the nearest and dearest around me--and not money, career success or material possessions. All the better if I can relate better to my family and close friends, be they introverts or extroverts.

Melancholy Songs

Pointers For Managing Self

Some pointers I gleaned so far from Tony Schwartz's Be Excellent At Anything: The Four Keys To Transforming The Way We Work And Live:

1) Our attention span typically lasts 90min max. Anything more and performance suffers. Yet most of us in desk-bound jobs easily find ourselves sitting down for hours at a stretch. Schwartz's suggestion: Take frequent renewal breaks, be it active (running, read a book) or passive (napping, lunching).

2) Sleep is important. With sufficient rest, your mind and body are better able to perform optimally.

3) Exercise is key, including cardio which keeps your mind alert and your heart beating strong and healthily and strengthening which maintains muscle mass requisite for daily activities (especially crucial for aging bodies).

4) Our brains programme us in fight-or-flight emotional responses when our sense of self-security is threatened. Triggers include being scolded or being neglected. Whichever response is instinctive to you depends on your personality. To better deal with such situations, try to take control of yourself (breathe & stay calm) and respond in a way that is atypical of you.

Question now is how do I apply these pointers practically and consistently in my daily life? Conscious self-discipline is certainly the key.

See The Big Picture

Look

God With Us

One of the toughest struggles for a Christian is that God can seem absent in the darkest of moments. Or we feel His presence but our cries for help go unanswered and our pains don't go away.

Does God care, does God know what I'm going through, we wonder.

Best we remember moments when He impresses a word, a verse or a thought upon us. Because that's what sustains us. That's what gives hope and assurance.

I choose to remain hopeful and to remind myself that He is Immanuel "God with us".

And in spite of what I've gone through in the past one & a half years, I choose to be thankful for things worth thanking God for.

Life is a journey, a friend reminded recently during a conversation. Which direction are we heading? Where do we want to go? And who's going along with us?

Go in the direction of your heart. Find your focus and be established in fruitful living where daily joys keep you going.

I wanna go to Marz

Marz by John Grant

One two three four...

Bittersweet strawberry marshmallow butterscotch
Polarbear cashew dixieland phosphate chocolate
My tutti frutti special raspberry, leave it to me
Three grace scotch lassie cherry smash lemon free

I wanna go to Marz
Where green rivers flow
And your sweet sixteen is waiting for you after the show
I wanna go to Mraz
We'll meet the gold dust twins tonight
You'll get your heart's desire, I will meet you under the lights

Golden champagne juicy grapefruit lucky monday
High school footall hot fudge buffalo tulip sundae
Almond caramel frappe pineapple rootbeer
Black and white pennyapple henry ford sweetheart maple tea

I wanna go to Marz
Where green rivers flow
And your sweet sixteen is waiting for you after the show
I wanna go to Mraz
We'll meet the gold dust twins tonight
You'll get your heart's desire, I will meet you under the lights

Shape Your Habits, Direct Your Life

Reading Charles Duhigg's The Power Of Habit really enlightened me and encouraged me on how one's personal habits can be changed and even harnessed for greater effectiveness in life.

We all know that everyone struggles with habits in various areas of our lives--that is, bad habits that call out to be managed and good habits that we always struggle to keep. Think new year resolutions.

First the bad news: habits, once formed, can't be gotten rid of because neural pathways are formed in our brains and even when we stop practising the habit, the pathways are still there, waiting to be activated.

The good news is that bad habits can be changed! And once we understand the anatomy of a habit, we can learn to form good habits! And it is through our daily habits that we can begin to build the life we desire.

So what's a habit? A habit is made of a loop which is first triggered by a cue such as mid-afternoon when you start to feel peckish. Once triggered, you begin to feel a craving and desire that begs to be satisfied. That's how we get into a habitual routine which serves to achieve a desired reward (e.g. hunger is satiated, feel good from endorphins etc.). And all this can happen without much forethought because our brains have been programmed through repeated habit cycles. This latter point can work both for us and against us.



Two examples:
- Cue: running shoes left next to the bed. Routine: run first thing in the morning. Reward: endorphine rush and a healthy breakfast.
- Cue: feeling sad. Routine: drink. Reward: forget the troubles.

Grasp this: The key ingredients to building instilling good habits are:

• Belief - Whatever your habit is, if you believe that your habit can be changed, it makes a critical difference whether you can sustain and follow through your habit change. Whether your belief is based upon spirituality or otherwise, Duhigg cites research such as recovering alcoholics that demonstrates how crucial belief is.
• Willpower - Don't give up! As we say in my church, keep on keeping on! Your breakthrough is round the corner! Another advice given to me by someone who recovered from depression by forcing himself to do what seemed really difficult, be ruthless. That said, willpower is like a muscle that can tire, such as after a long day of meetings and important decision making. That's why often we find it hard to kick ourselves to go for a run at the end of a tiring work day.
• Identify keystone habits - A keystone habit is one that causes shifts in other areas of your life and other good habits begin to fall in place. Such as regular exercise which usually leads one to eat more healthily, smoke less and sleep more. Interestingly, this habit might not even seem related to what you're trying to achieve. Duhigg reported about the power of visualization through how Michael Phelps' coach got him to repeatedly watch a video tape of a perfect swim every night and every morning.
• Understand moments of immense stress can trigger old habits - Duhigg mentions about people who do recover from alcoholism or drugs, but when a serious, personal crisis hits, these people lapse back into their destructive habits.

I simplify the practical habit-changing steps offered by Duhigg:

1) Identify the triggering habit cues. Think along five areas: time, location, emotional state, other people & the immediately preceding action.

2) Experiment with rewards to identify what is the gratification you're really after. It might not actually be the food you take during a tea break, but it could be company and a reprieve from work.

3) Think of a plan to change your routine according to the identified cue and reward. This step is essentially because otherwise you will feel compelled to lapse into your old habit. Separately, I've heard Dr. Robi Sonderegger explain that a temptation lasts about 7 minutes and that your planned distraction or new habit has to engage you emotionally if it is to be adopted effectively.

Read how Duhigg explains these steps.



And I'm absolutely inspired! I hope to apply this newfound wisdom not only to physical habits, but also to financial habits and mental habits. I also recognize that this is a journey and positive change won't take place place overnight. But bit by bit, if we keep at it, doing the right things and picking our bruised selves up when we do stumble, we can direct and transform our lives towards where we want to go.

Final note: Duhigg actually studies not just the habits of individuals but also in organizations and he goes into the realm of marketing strategies, corporate culture and practices. So you'll definitely find this book enlightening in many ways.

Stop Everything You're Doing & Be Grateful

The Why Question

Who hasn't wondered if God is real, and if He is, then why does He allow distress, troubles and even calamities and crises in our lives?

God has never really answered my "why" questions. It's left me wondering, searching and even bereft at one time.

At some point, I believe my purpose--His purpose for my life--will be understood.

For now, it takes trust. That is, trusting that God will move and act in His time to bring about the best outcome and path for me.

How will things turn out in future, we wonder? For good, I believe. I'm learning that one's past does not determine one's future.

Can you believe that positive change and progress will come in your life?

Move from Why to Yes. Your life depends on it.

Understanding Introverts

Marius Ziska (Live on KEXP)

Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life

Pointers gleaned from John C Maxwell's book - How Successful People Think.

1. Cultivate Big Picture Thinking
- What are the needs? And their causes?
- Who are the stakeholders? What are they thinking or doing with respect to the needs?

2. Engage in Focused Thinking
- What goals can be identified?
- How to achieve them?

3. Harness Creative Thinking
- How can we see/do things better?
- Who can we learn from?

4. Employ Realistic Thinking
- Face the facts
- Identify the pros, cons, worst case & resources needed

5. Utilize Strategic Thinking
- What's your plan?
- Who are you teaming with?

6. Explore Possibility Thinking
- Dream bigger & more fantastically
- Learn from achievers

7. Learn from Reflective Thinking
- Spend time reflecting
- Reflect in terms of what matters to you
- Make real changes

8. Question Popular Thinking
- Think for yourself
- Do things differently
- Do new things

9. Benefit from Shared Thinking
- Value others & enjoy interaction
- Plan for meetings: What's your agenda? Invite those who can contribute.

10. Practice Unselfish Thinking
- Give to benefit others
- Give anonymously if possible
- Check your motives

11. Rely on Bottom-Line Thinking
- What are your purpose and goal?
- How's your daily progress?

Changing The World

Two books have been on my desk: How To Change The World: Social Entrepreneurs And The Power Of New Ideas and Half The Sky: Turning Oppression Into Opportunity For Women Worldwide.

They report numerous accounts of individuals (from the past and more recent) who aren't famous but yet are worthy of remembering because of how they worked against immense opposition and deep-rooted resistance to, well, change their world. They've effected changes that remove or reduce discrimination against groups of people like women and disabled people, that provide them the means to survive, that bring a sense of near-normalcy and deliverance to places of oppression and helplessness.

Change starts with...not so much the idea, but with men and women who dare to envision a different, better circumstance. Social change, business change, culture change...whatever it is, they see it and actually live it.

What gives courage to pursue change and to keep pursuing it through one's life? The deep burden to see the lives of loved ones, fellow ones removed from suffering? Anger at the ineffectual institutions that don't seem to care enough to bother? The will to believe that things can get and will get better?

It doesn't have to require a noble, grand cause and a huge effort to get started. Just meet one need at a time, around you and me. Little needs, not-so-little needs... And don't do it for recognition or affirmation, but do it simply knowing that you tried to make a difference.

Hanoi Trip (Oct 2012)

The Sound Of Two Songs (by Mark Power)

The Sound Of Two Songs is a photo-project by Mark Power spanning 2004 to 2009. He documents and presents his take on Poland, its landscape and people.

...instigated by Magnum Photos to document countries joining the European Union that year. Despite having no familial ties to the country, he soon became fascinated by Poland. Over the next five years he made a further twenty visits, often accompanied by Polish photographer Konrad Pustola who generously shared his knowledge of his native land. Over time Power’s focus shifted from an investigation into the effects of EU membership into a more subjective, poetic and autobiographical response to a country he grew to love...

Power’s images exemplify his belief that ‘ugliness can be profoundly beautiful’. They present Poland as a land ‘bursting with visual contradictions… like listening to several melodies at once to the point where it’s difficult to hear anything clearly’, a notion which inspired the title of the exhibition. It is a place seen by a foreigner, an outsider; a position Power has resolutely maintained throughout. A highly personal body of work, The Sound of Two Songs nonetheless remains an important historical document of this fascinating period in Poland’s history.

Thai Photography Of The Past

74-year-old Pornsak Sakdaenprai talks about his photography work half a century ago in a small Isan town. Video courtesy of Bangkok Post. In Thai with English subtitles.

Thinking About Consumption

Caught DIVE! a documentary by Jeremy Seifert on America's food waste problem. Proving that dumpster food can be safe for consumption, he along with others rifle through dumpsters regularly--not compelled by poverty but by a reluctance to see valuable food go to waste.

Seifert reports that America dumps 96 billion pounds of consumable food every year, which takes up 20% of landfills. Key fact to remember: there is a cost, i.e. resources, that's expended to produce food, although it's not visible to the consumer. So throwing away a single pound of food means we actually waste all the resources that went into putting it on our dinner table.

It's not just a film that aims to change consumer behaviour, but more than that, to highlight how food companies have a crucial role to play in deciding how to manage excess/expended food.

Something to seriously think about as we bite into our foods, not just our favourite but also those that we don't fancy and would feel nothing about letting it go to waste.

Which leads me to...



In Must-Have: The Hidden Instincts Behind Everything We Buy, Geoffrey Miller breaks down how consumers' display of their lifestyles, through the cars, music, clothes, books, foods, life partners, opinions etc. are all driven by innate evolutionary desires to appear more attractive and therefore better able to mate and find success.

Miller offers many ideas and explanations for our consumer behaviour--he can be tongue-in-cheek at times--including "Central Six" attributes and not demographics that can fairly accurately predict behaviour. He concludes with suggestions to change social norms such as imposing extra retail taxes on brand new products to curb consumption, raising the prices of products with intangible costs (e.g. social costs such as ammo for guns).

The main takeaway: Consider and weigh our own motivations for lifestyle choices.

Food for thought: What motivates people to give or get involved in charity? If it's sympathy-inducing situations coupled with latent desire to do good without being too inconvenienced...why do most of us brush aside people who beg on the streets? Do givers/carers need to have positive giving experiences in order to encourage them to continue giving/caring?



e² design by PBS features inspiring projects and architects/designer who have consciously implemented designs that are--here comes the E word--environmentally conscious.

Key points: Good design requires forethought and consideration of context and culture. Implementation of bold ideas requires willingness and flexibility to try. See the larger picture in order to appreciate various factors at work.

It's not about tree-hugging sentiments, but actually about practical concerns such as how to save costs in the long run, how to reduce energy usage, how to create a conducive, comfortable and culturally-relevant social space etc. If only we can just stop and ask ourselves them questions.

Rethinking & Reusing

A house that took just 3 days to lay its two-ton concrete slabs and structural steel beams that were disposed from Boston's Big Dig.





Reusing something that's trashed--disposed highway parts in this case--to build your own house, is seldom the first thought that comes to mind to most of us. How do you incorporate such materials with a design that fits its neighbourhood and surroundings?

This project was featured in e2, PBS' documentary series on green architecture design. You can read more about its development here.

Rediscovery & Remaking

I just finished reading India Calling by Anand Giridharadas, an Indian native who as a youth moves to America with his parents and later decides to relocate back to his homeland, I suppose, to rediscover his roots. He writes about India's transformation in its social castes & the relationships in-between and its values towards success in life, towards family & marriage. It depicts each new definition through various characters he recalls through his family lineage such as his parents and their parents as well as those he encounters who each represent the old and the new India and the tensions therein.

You can read a review as well as an excerpt of this book here by NPR--it also includes an interview with the author as he talks about changes he witnessed.

And now I'm thinking about my own place in my country: a dwelling place where social ties and fond memories reside, a marketplace of making a living and pursuing aspirations, and a place of belonging where my loyalty is demanded.

One can lament some things, yet one can also be grateful--for those same things and also for others. Perhaps the crux of our identity lies in how we choose to make a place: Do you choose to belong and to contribute to shaping it? And if you do nothing, you either shape the status quo or you allow others to shape it along with you in it.

Questions that are being asked today: Where do we want to head and at what cost? Who should bear responsibility for each aspect of the systems we're building? Should we allow age-old institutions to adapt to modern lifestyles?

As a friend recently responded to my suggestion for him to join the national conversation even while he's abroad, how can I who am currently out of the system voice out for a matter which the local actors have the say and probably already had theirs?

In short: First, choose to be a stakeholder. Then, choose how you want to remake your place.

Awareness

Half The Sky by Nicholas D. Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn is an immensely sobering and absorbing read because it puts the spotlight on the gritty issue of the sex trafficking of women. I'm a quarter through it...

Heavy and stirring it is. Its real life accounts of women coerced and trapped in prostitution illuminates the complexities involved in efforts to liberate these poor women. It also inspires how women, whether victims themselves and/or community heroes, are trying to help others.

Awareness is the first step. I'm not sure what's next...because I'm just learning about a whole lot of world issues demanding our attention.

Stay tuned and continue this journey.

Selecting

When deciding on a major decision and direction to pursue, you have to weigh what matters to you. Not pragmatically or directed by other's expectations, but being true to yourself.

Perhaps look at the examples of those around you. Are they doing what you wish you were? Can you see yourselves in their shoes?

Sometimes you hit a bump and you gotta make a change to find that breakthrough you been dreaming about. And sometimes no one can really help you; they might give you advice but you're the only one who can try it for yourself.

Keep looking forward, pressing on. Only you can forge the future you want.

Making Room

Been clearing my room progressively. All useless things of no sentimental value must go.

Photos & journal entries hark back to days long past. Of earlier thoughts, events and seasons.

Oh how we move on...

We all have memories we want to discard. We thought we already did, but they bubble up, sometimes unexpectedly, from the recesses within. Perhaps memories are as powerful as you ascribe them to be.

Whatever's happened in the past, don't be beholden to it. It doesn't determine your future. Today's choices do--unless you choose to do nothing.

How do you know you've room for new things in your life? It's certainly not just about diving headlong into them and expecting instant adaptation. It's not about juggling more and more things together, because some will quickly fall from the lack of focus. So what is it?

Accomodating through space and behavior seems to be it.

Without the new, the mundane & routine dominate.

Make a choice.

Mentalist

Homeland - Putting your finger on suspicions

Though a drama, yet the terror radicalist situation it depicts feels real and quite believable. Because the issues are close to its nation's heart: of war veterans and their psychological wounds and of a war that is ongoing as shown by recent events.

What captivates must be its 2 central characters: an CIA agent battling externally through rogue means and also battling internally as well to keep herself together and functioning; and a soldier recovering from terrors of war whose malintent is played out gradually and whose tortured mind is revealed through flitting memories and demons.

What gives us tenacity to cling on to a mission of eradicating an elusive enemy through all possible means? Is it loyalty to a cause and to one's country? Is it to vindicate one's hunches and actions?

Stay tuned as more is revealed next.

Breaking Bad - What your gut is capable of

Pressed by circumstances in life, it seems everyone and anyone can turn to the latent dark side. Life can be tough and cruel. It's all about how we choose to respond, isn't it?

Unmet needs feed our addictions which some try to hide and deny when confronted. The need to be accepted, affirmed and loved. The need to do something purposeful in life employing your abilities. The need to fight on when your survival is threatened.

The line on morality is drawn into question: How far would you go to save yourself and to give up what you've tried to hold on to?

Plans

Change comes about when you take action. Progressive change is when the action is according to the plan you have determined.

What's your goal? Are you convicted that it's a worthy one and your motivation is right for you?

Have a plan of action.

If it's a problem to be solved, you need a plan.

If it's to enhance your quality of life, get a plan.

Even if it's to discover something completely novel and untrodden, I'm pretty certain a plan is still essential.

Plan practical steps to break routines, change ways of thought, learn new ones, form new connections, explore new places...

You'll get there. You only simply have to get started.

Change

(chānj)
• To undergo transformation or transition.
• To go from one phase to another, as the moon or the seasons.
(Courtesy of www.tfd.com)

If we want to move into a house that is bigger, better & more posh than the previous one, I guess we'd better leave our baggage and old keepsakes behind. Wouldn't want the clutter of old to come along with you, would you?

With each change in life, there are uncomfortable moments of uncertainty and perhaps anxiety. But better to be drawn and motivated by new opportunities than to dwell on the past. It's not easy to unshackle mindsets and familiar ways of rationalizing and doing things--sometimes it takes another to point it out--but if we don't try...what if we end up like the frog in the slow-boiling pot, or worse, flash-fried frog! 反求诸己 or self-awareness and self-checking is definitely a good thing to have.

I recently read Entrepreneurship: From Idea To Success by Farhad Foroutan-Esfahani. An anecdote about seeking answers in the proverbial "Book of Answers" struck me. Its moral summarized: The learning and discovery is in the journey--no one can tell you the answers from the onset.

With our each moving on from one [blank] to another (replace [blank] with job, life stage, marital status, social group etc), uncertainty is always present. Hopefully it is the new pasture that's beckoning. Or if you can't see it, then start taking steps to find it. At least I know I will--gonna take 1 step, and another, and another. And if I take the wrong step, God help me.

It is better to finish a matter than to begin one... For now, all I can simply do now is to close the previous chapter, however it happened, and move on. Self-berating helps no one, I've found, and least of all, yourself.

Look ahead. Look up. Look far! The rest of the journey's just begun!

Life Mission

Why would a man risk his own life just to capture tumultuous events on film?

Watched a documentary on photojournalist, Philip Blenkinsop, and was struck by his lack of fear and trepidation. What drives him?

"It can be depressing. You spend time with people under constant threat, but once you've actually spent time with these people, and you have put the pictures out on the world stage through magazines, and you have actually arranged to draw attention to these people and bring them to the politicians who you think it should matter to, and make a difference, you realize it doesn't change a damn thing." ~ Taken from here

See his work here and here (warning: disturbing graphic images)

Reel Ideas

1. 那些年，我們一起追的女孩

Romance and aspirations of your youth, remember them? Of doing silly things that you don't really regret?

Feels like a while back.

One character in the show said, "我想成为一个很厉害的人，因为有了我，让这个世界，而有一点点的不一样..."

Whatever life throws at you, just hold on. Does your heart bury one thing while in pursuit of another?

Well, gotta realize what matters to you. Else regret is inevitable.



2. The Amazing Spiderman

Having already decided to take a beginning leap of faith towards a mission to save the world (literally), things can line up in your favor to aid you along. And if you don't take that step, you won't even know this and experience this.

Perhaps lack of success and even failure can happen. But in the eyes of others and especially the One, we want to see you keep on going. Our hearts are sustaining you.

Well, there are heroes in this world. There are also hero-supporters and enablers in this world.

Take a leap...at the right moment.



3. Bernie

Do many good deeds negate a wrong? Does it matter how a person lives his/her private life if many people around are being helped?

For sure, what takes place in the dark eventually comes to the light. Fully revealed, do you even like what you see?

Live a life that is true to yourself and to the right values.

Happiness & Mystique

Consumption

Finished reading "Freedom", a novel by Jonathan Franzen. Meet 3 characters who fell for each other in their own way and even as they grew older, they never saw what it was that truly brought them joy and acceptance. It's a book about, well without saying enough, finding love, parenting, holding on to ideals, self-discovery... These folks never quite gave up their pursuit of that thing till resolution does come many years later. The amazing scene for me was when P made a desperate attempt to get back together with W and they finally saw eye-to-eye with each other. Everybody makes mistakes in life, but it's how you learn and move on from them that matters.

Also read "How Starbucks Saved My Life", a short autobiography by Michael Gates Gill. Was touched when Mike persisted in calling his doctor to help his boss's uncle who was having heart difficulties. I think meaning and purpose really do come from everyday moments where actions meet needs. I'm not writing book reviews here. That said, if you need a jolt on which direction to pursue in life, you should pick this book up.

Watched "Cool It", a video about Bjorn Lomborg, a gutsy yet sounds-sensible environmentalist cum professor who is controversial for disputing with recognized bodies on the cause and seriousness of global warming. What seems most sensible in the video is simply that we should put things in perspective: For the solutions that we want everyone to implement, what are really the benefits and necessary costs, and could we better invest these resources elsewhere? And go back to your motivations: Are they more fear and emotion-driven than being rational to examine other possible causes?

Moving On

It's less about the passing of time but about taking responsibility, being positive and shaking the dirt off one's feet.

In the face of uncertainty, the risk of failure is...there. Don't want to regret, don't want to worry, but to plan ahead and then to let go.

Joy rekindled is what I need.

Silence

Onward

Hands that are used to washing & wringing clothes over decades continue to do so.

Memories of past decades, earlier times & deeds (& misdeeds) etched but slowly fade.

How much can one go through in a lifetime--life, death, loss & joys? How much can one eat & enjoy?

Surely onward we continue, upward we aspire. A better new day of happiness & fulfillment we hope of.

Don't give up, most of all, on yourself.

Sense & Sensibleness

Cousin's wife passed away on Saturday morning. She's 36yo, chirpy personality and, as my uncle describes, a brave person who endured braved a 2-year battle with breast cancer. And none of us knew of this.

We sat with my uncle, Uncle Jack, at the wake and though his eyes were a little red, he was upbeat and talked on and on. Cousin looked worn. He was occupied with other well-meaning visitors.

My uncle said some things which I want to remember:

#1 - Whenever Ah Gong (grandpa) calls him and asks him for something, Uncle Jack would agree even before Ah Gong completes the sentence. My grandpa is 95yo, practically blind and his hearing isn't good. So, as uncle put it, he has to deal with B-O-R-E-D-O-M as he can't watch TV or listen to the radio. Most of all, Uncle Jack says, do what you can now--don't regret on the day Ah Gong passes away.

#2 - "I'm an adventurous person. I've tried MANY things." Even as he related how he used to be a "tang kee" (spirit medium), he thinks it was all hypnotic trance-inducing hocus-pocus. Man of little fear he is.

It's not for me to compare my uncle with myself or my own dad. But there is much good sense to be caught for one's own life, wouldn't you say?

Kishi Bashi: NPR Music Tiny Desk Concert

Kishi Bashi is the pseudonym of singer, multi-instrumentalist, and songwriter K Ishibashi (born November 4, 1975). Born in Seattle, Washington, but growing up predominantly on the east coast, Ishibashi has recorded with and toured internationally as a violinist with such diverse artists such as Regina Spektor, Sondre Lerche, and most recently, the Athens, Georgia based indie rock group of Montreal, of which he is currently a member. Ishibashi is also the singer and founding member of the New York synth rock outfit, Jupiter One. In 2011, he started to record and perform as a solo artist, opening for Sondre Lerche, Alexi Murdoch, and of Montreal. He will support of Montreal on their upcoming spring 2012 tour. Ishibashi has a side project called Cop Gravy, he plans on releasing his first EP under this moniker on the Joyful Noise label in late 2012, it has the tentative title "I Lost My Wrestling Match To Davey Pierce On The Big Black Bus".

Read more on Wiki...

Positive Change

Truer than true, youer than you. Don't want to regret at the end of your life?

Could I have worked harder? Nah... Smarter? Oh yeah.

Spent more time with friends? Definitely.

Watched Coldplay's tribute to Adam Yauch and the lyrics went, you've gotta fight for your right to party.

Be remembered for what matters to you. Imagine your eulogy.

Live with joy, purpose &...gratitude.

Restitution

When you done wrong
when you took too long
Guilt lingers.
Where does closure come?

Expect scolding
Wrath
Words that...

Goodness me, what am I to do??

Forgiveness we all seek
Restitution I guess we should make.

Weekend in revue

This weekend marked the 10th anniversary of Sun's crossover project. We ended by singing the song, 愿意为你. Amazed I was by all that was shared. But most of all, what touched me was the love that Pastor has for Jesus. The willingness to obey, no matter how trying it can be.

You can't say, "Having done all" unless you've truly done & been through it all. And that will be the real test of your temerity & willingness.

Awoke to the same haunting chinese lyrics.

Caught Trainstopping: 2011 The Year In Review. Hilarious, well-delivered yet also suitably poignant in its recall of infamous events & phrases. A great beginning for this brand new company.

Now taking the train home as I type this. Public transport, essential, experienced everyday, taken for granted most of the time.

Real Life

Man approaches to ask for money - $1.50 - for supposed bus fare. I think he's begging to feed something else & I decline. He walks away & I notice he's got a decent looking watch on. He turns the corner & turns again onto the pavement in front. I look at him, he looks back & I look away. Suddenly I wonder about my safety and Singapore's supposed surreal safety.

Boy breaks loose from grandpa who's still holding his older sister's hand. He dashes a little onto the road while grandpa yells. Grandpa lurches forward, grabs him roughly & scolds him. All this while there's no traffic on the road. Sister's silent. I carry on walking.

Dad scrubs sweet potatoes with kitchen sponge. I think about the germs on the sponge. Now what would you do next?
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Identity

The way we talk, dress, move... The things we value, activities we do, the people we associate with... Our attitudes and perspective...

Alone or together, you see it.

The person you want to be. Who you see yourself as. What you want to embrace and pursue. Who you allow to speak into you and challenge you to transform your ways?

Get out of your own skin, yet be true to who you are--do you know who you are?

End Goal

Instead of asking what outcome is defined for one, how about asking what we want to see achieved?

The word's been given, hasn't it? Glimpses of the future are caught...

Should we quit asking what's next, but start planning what's next? Realisation, as long as you can still do something, didn't come too late.

What kind of change, movement, shift do you want to see? Don't stop there. See it? Outline it.

Follow your heart and you shouldn't go wrong. Divine correction brings you back on course if you veer off. Peer support makes it easier to get through. But you--you're the driver. Or co-driver, should I say?

Active is a state of keeping balance by moving forward--like unicycling, a friend recently shared. Forward, back, forward, side, forward for sure. Thoughts might be raw, views inchoate, but in time, character and conviction and right daily choices will see you to the end.

Polarizing

Why is it wrong to use public funds to profit a private entity even when it is expected to lead to public good? Why is it lamentable that the powers that be aren't doing enough to redistribute wealth to help the underprivileged? Why is it sad that iconic buildings that encapsulate memory and meaning are torn down to make way for new progressive developments?

Issues, problems that we tangle with daily, they demand solutions that are effective, sustainable and some would say, equitable. Whatever their interests, we elect leaders to lead us in the future. Yet no man-made governance is perfect, no man-leader is faultless.

I would say, collectively, intelligently, creatively, we together gotta each make a difference.

From awareness to being equipped to acting out your conviction to fine-tuning and constant innovation, positive change comes through...well, the heart, really.

What provokes you, stirs you, impassions you to action?

Value the good values that will ensure posterity.

Swift

Wine skin. Paradigm. Heart. Epoch. Underwear.

Figured the common denominator?

When the rules of the game gotta--What's the game anyway?

For profit? For social benefit? For staying above the water?

Beyond the novelty, what keeps one coming back for more? With many mouths & hearts to feed, who do you target?

Listen and feel the wind. What's rising? What's falling?

Learn to surf and ride the tide. Away the rip that pulls you under. New lands, new shores, new heights to conquer.

No music, did you realise?

Power is the capacity to apply your strengths as needed--or not needed.

At what point does a tortured soul turn maniacal? Tortured by others yet not seen by others. Without an other, what grinds and tests one's reasoning and maturity?

We don't always have an answer. We don't always need to know.

If I could fly...soar...speed...thrust through the air...can I escape gravity? Reality?

Morality, what a word. We don't need to philosophize, but what is good? Okay, too big a question. To what extent is it okay to expend or hurt something that seems trashy for the sake of getting and saving another of importance to you?

Moving through the day, activity, tasks, completion, progress...What gives one sufficient vision to realize where you actually are?

Awareness illuminates. Reach out with unseen hands and fix the pieces of your future. Muscles unused don't grow. Unused muscles will feel raw, weak, but given exercise AND nourishment, they grow.

Strength to strength, you can do more. Do what, you ask?

Liberty given, liberty lived. Don't be captive to the chains and weights that can be easily broken. Easily is not an easy word.

Turn on the music. Life should be enjoyable, fruitful and legacy-building.

King of the Lane

Come to terms with (fill in the blank). When a disruptive event occurs and you realize something precious to you is lost, the correct thing to do is to change, to adapt and to make reparations.

What if you can't?

What if, at that point, you start to see yourself for who you are, and the other in more clarity?

Then the ground gets pulled from under you...

Life is brief. Read Psalm 90.

Serving the needs and expectations of superiors and others is important, isn't it? When one's attitude is apparent for one to see...can't close eyes and shake it off...

Worthy of pursuit is--not activities with temporary gain--the realising of deep-seated purpose. Like rain reaching through the ground and meeting the water table.

Find that purposeful living and make it yours.

****prints in the sand

One night I had a wondrous dream.
One set of footprints there was seen,
the footprints of my precious Lord,
but mine were not along the shore.

But then some stranger prints appeared
and I asked the Lord, "What have we here?
Those prints are large and round and neat,
but, Lord, they are too large for feet."

"My child," he said in sober tones,
"For miles I carried you alone.
I challenged you to walk in faith,
but you refused and made me wait.

"You disobeyed, you would not grow.
The walk of faith you would not know.
So I got tired, I got fed up,
and there I dropped you on your butt.

"Because in life there comes a time
when one must fight and one must climb,
when one must rise and take a stand
or leave their butt prints in the sand."

Writer unknown

An Animated History of Human Communication

1965 Educational Film about the Telephone

People

This week, two people in the pool caught my eye as I lapped past them. One was a paraplegic with shrivelled legs who was swimming front crawl in an effortful manner. Maybe he's used to people staring, well, it takes some degree to guts and self-acceptance to bare himself like that.

The other man whom I didn't notice at first had a three-lined scar centred on his chest. I imagined the doctor cutting through below the rib cage and then snapping through the sternum. Explains why he was swimming slowly I guess. Perhaps recovering post-op.

Whatever that brought us to where we are, are we letting it have a stranglehold? A baggage that's familiarly heavy? A wound that we keep picking?

Maybe someone else is looking at you and wondering how you came to be. Maybe the scars or limitations aren't obvious... Are we living like they're there?

Live strong, I say.

Currently Reading - Food Politics: What Everyone Needs to Know by Robert Paarlberg

Holstee Manifesto

Thoughts of Artistry

It's about working with the gifting that we have, I told a friend yesterday over coffee.

Was Van Gogh's life a tragedy? Or more accurately, a tragic life that left a deep legacy that will continue to affect thousands? Plagued--yes, constantly wracked and worn--by insanity, talented before his time, loved and supported by his loved one to pursue his art... Makes you wonder what's the best way to leave this world? ...and the best way to live in this world?

Dare we pursue what we're created for? What if there's no promise of success and prosperity and all the comfortable markers of making it in society?

Reading T.L. Friedman's books and watching programmes which lay out the case against rampant globalization, ravaging of the natural environment, nature ravaging us in turn, the ill-privileged poor, it really makes one wonder what one is doing to tackle or at least acknowledge social problems around us?

If I want to leave a legacy that ripples and that future artists can leverage, what must I do?

Find a cause--or let it find you. Gather up courage. Stir up creativity within, sometimes without. Then carry on!

Thing is, we are who we are. Like Elphaba, green as can be, yet finding home and ease in a city as green as she. Each needs acceptance, to be hugged and embraced by people. Finding our place, no matter how quirky or unique we think we are.

And remember this, the human spirit is indefatigable, even in death--that is, if he or she so chooses. What makes one give up? What makes another persist?

Rise above your feelings, rally up your daily passion, and be the artist you were meant to be!

Let Go

By Jess Penner

are we or are we not hanging like icicles from the rooftops we are growing in the cold taking shape and taking hold because this is our time now

I know that things are so different than you imagined but you imagined so donʼt stop now because weʻre gonna see the dream before we drop drop drop drop down drop drop drop drop down oh oh

let go let go let go itʼs gonna be ok ok I know weʼre gonna fall fast yeah but then real slow youʼre gonna find your wings have finally grown (let go let go let go)

I swear I swear sometimes youʼre just so serious itʼs like youʼd crack your face with a smile If you forget yourself for a while the world might crumble in

let go let go let go itʼs gonna be ok ok I know weʼre gonna fall fast yeah but then real slow youʼre gonna find your wings have finally grown (let go let go let go)

are we or are we not hanging like icicles from the rooftops we are growing in the cold taking shape and taking hold because this is our time now

Tell Me A Tale

By Michael Kiwanuka

Tell me a tale that always was,
Sing me a song that I'll always be in,
Tell me a story that I can read,
Tell me a story that I believe.

Paint me a picture that I can see,
Give me a touch that I can feel,
Turn me around so I can be,
Everything I was meant to be.

Lord I need loving,
Lord I need good, good loving.
Lord I need good, good loving.

Show me some strength that I can use,
Give me a sound that I won't refuse,
Tell me story that I can read,
Tell me a story that I can believe

Tell me a tale that always was,
Sing me a song that I'll always be in,
Turn me around so I can be,
Everything I was meant to be.

Lord I need loving,
Lord I need good, good loving.
Lord I need good, good loving.
Lord I need good, good loving.
Lord I need good, good loving.

Swimming Through Life

The same medium, all human, but each goes a different stroke, a different goal & a different pace.

Is the aim to be the fastest? The least splash? Or the longest influencing ripples??

Maybe we look at another and think we know better, we can do better. Seriously, not everyone wants to be coached.

The odd is, when others start to leave, the awkward competition stops and you want to get out too.

Stick it till you complete your laps. Routine but surely there's an end in mind, no?

Liminality by Obsquare

Where are the courageous men?

We choose. To act. Not to act. To accept ourselves and the choices we already made.

Good or bad, it's sealed. Now what matters is how you're responding to it.

Equipped with more knowledge & experience, we should be making better choices. But often we go back to the same. Because "that's who I am"..."That's how I've been feeling"..."I don't like to..."

If you don't know what to say, don't say anything--that's something I often hear internally.

If the situation arises and your precious is threatened, courage will arise. If the cause manifests itself, courage will arise.

Ask yourself what kind of person you want to be, what would you do differently if the same thing happens? Perhaps that will help guide our choices.

Life should be pursuing what matters. We know this but not always what matters. That's why clarity and confirmation matter.

Foster the right thoughts that'll help you make right choices.

Happiness

What's the difference between pursuing spiritual goals & material goals? Between godliness & wealth, while not diametric, what is worth pouring one's energy into?

For the love of life, do something that will bring you lasting happiness. We say this but won't you just live it??

Quit the lousy feeling and get the groove back on. If you've tried something and it didn't work out, just shrug it off and move on.

Like a retro techno-beats song that echos... "Got-ta move on... Got-ta move on... Got-ta move on..."

Others can see the unhappiness ON you already. So quit saying "I'm okay" when you're not okay.

Lesson learnt from yet another movie last night: Don't keep hanging your hang-up because for all you know, it's not justified at all and you could have thrown it out a long time ago.

Get over it! Move on! Cheer up!

A Matter of the Heart

Our actions & words can betray what's in our hearts. But what's really brewing within? What thoughts are going through?

Maybe at the subconscious level, even we don't know ourselves. Maybe that's why we need an other to show us what we're really exhibiting.

A man without a vision will always return to his past, this has been echoing within, since I heard Dr Bernard's podcast message. Progress comes of a desire to get better coupled with a ruthless cutting off of poorer ways. Advancement should come of one's own agenda...what if I have no agenda?

What if I'm dissatisfied pushing another's agenda? The Son does what He sees the Father does. Sounds like the pattern in life.

In the next Timothy Keller message I heard, he spoke of sonship. A son is one who has access to the father--Keller used this great illustration of how while he might ignore his spouse waking him in the middle of the night to ask for water, he would definitely respond to his son's request for water.

The Father is not one who would give hard non-satisfying stones in place of sustenance-giving bread. Do I--do we--know that?

We speak of love. Beyond the lips, what is love really? Forgiving & tolerating any and all mistakes? Sayang-ing and providing emotional balm any time it's needed? Offering ready company and attention? Sounds more like infantcare/childcare.

The Father wants us to grow up, to grow strong, to grow closer... Have you, have I, have we grown this year?

Push to grow & keep growing, crucially, in the right direction and season.

3 days to Christmas

Yesterday I heard another sermon podcast by Timothy Keller of Redeemer Church. The Prodigal God, it's called (get it a la iTunes).

We're all (errr, believers) familiar with the story of the prodigal son. As Ps. Keller points out, it's easy to spot yourself in the prodigal son "younger brother" syndrome. But there's an "older brother" syndrome that traps believers in a self-righteous mindset that's also unappreciative of the Father.

Instead of behaving like a son that the older brother's entitled to, he's behaving like a slave and resenting his spiritual "duty". Thing is, this older son's just as lost as the younger, Keller points out.

Earning our right before the Father, judging ourselves by the amount of prayer, good works and good attitude... The believer's walk should focus on the beauty of adoration. Maybe this is the struggle for those like me who grow up with a legalistic inclination.

Listening to Tomlin's Glory In The Highest, I ask myself, how do I glorify God? Browsing John Sung's biography, seems he interprets that as his life work of winning souls. That is important, but I don't think it's the end-all. Sung emphasizes that spiritual gifts are important but love is the greatest gift of all.

Love of God, love of men, reconciling differences--after all, we all stand before God as equal one day.

In stressful times, tempers flare, spiteful words erupt. But it would be naïve to dream of a lovey-dovey work environment.

Perhaps how we glorify God is simply how we live with love each day. Love, the commitment to doing our best. Love, the consideration for others. Love, keeping watch over loved ones in prayer. Love, asking what's on God's heart and He's placed in the hearts of shepherds He's appointed.

Our favourite Christmas ballad goes, Have yourself a merry little Christmas now. Make it merry & blessed, be happy and keep finding meaning in the everyday.

Rampart

Leaving office now at 4plus in the morning. It's less of having many things to do but rather feeling weighed down. Met Dan for lunch and talked about having the balance in our lives to pursue own interests. Choices, I said, it's up to us, really, to stay or to go.

Checked out a new "instrumental" CD which I usually avoid, because they're usually bland stuff. But this one's lush, genuinely moving orchestral motifs really got me. Reminded me of my friends too. Highlight of the day, I say.

Now, I'm reminded that I gotta be like Habbakuk to watch & listen.

Watch & listen. To without & to within.

Ssshhh.

Ramble

Substance

Over the past 6 months, I've seen more about myself, corrected myself. Stretched, yeah, and then feeling sore, sometimes utterly spent and discouraged and contemplating a way out.

6 months in, I'm still here. Move on beyond Why, now it's What's Next? What Now?

Sermon after sermon, week after week, resolve after resolve... No, it's not about feeling emo. Dad gave my good advice almost a week ago, to the effect of "Rise above how you feel."

What have I done? is what I'm thinking right now. Logical but not rational, inspirational but not spiritual, radical but not...clear.

Discern, clarify, determine, decide and do.

Thrive

By Switchfoot

Been fighting things that I can't see in
Like voices coming from the inside of me and
Like doing things I find hard to believe in
Am I myself or am I dreaming?

I've been awake for an hour or so
Checking for a pulse but I just don't know
Am I a man when I feel like a ghost?
The stranger in the mirror is wearing my clothes

No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
A steering wheel don't mean you can drive
A warm body don't mean I'm alive
No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
Feels like I travel but I never arrive
I want to thrive not just survive

I come alive when I hear you singing
But lately I haven't been hearing a thing and
I get the feeling that I'm in between
A machine and a man who only looks like me

I try and hide it and not let it show
But deep down inside me I just don't know
Am I a man when I feel like a hoax?
The stranger in the mirror is wearing my clothes

No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
A steering wheel don't mean you can drive
A warm body don't mean I'm alive
No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
Feels like I travel but I never arrive
I want to thrive not just survive

I'm always close but I'm never enough
I'm always in line but I'm never in love
I get so down but I won't give up
I get slowed down but I won't give up

Been fighting things that I can't see in
Like voices coming from the inside of me and
Like doing things I find hard to believe in
Am I myself or am I dreaming?

No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
A steering wheel don't mean you can drive
A warm body don't mean I'm alive
No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
Feel like I travel but I never arrive
I want to thrive not just survive

I want to thrive not just survive

I've Decided

By Galvin Sng

Better?

When you keep feeling inadequate and failing to please, should you still try to get better?

Name me a few characters that never failed to get better in their quest for meaning.

Thoughts that normally don't fill my mind now do. Negative and non-edifying, they gotta be dumped and replaced.

I can get better, I can learn from mistakes, you are here to help, you know my weaknesses...

Thought of giving up returns. What am I working for? Am I in the wrong place?

God help me. And I need a life.

Hands up

How do you get people to volunteer to meet needs?

Step 1 - Identify your willing people. What character qualities are necessary? What about skills? Level of availability?

Step 2 - Decide how you're going to call them out. How are you going to mobilise them? And train them--character and skills withstanding?

Step 3 - Call them.

Step 4 - Equip them, empower them, inspire them, encourage them, know them, befriend them... What's your real motive now?

And there's a crucial prior step of seeking and defining a worthy vision. That's right, the V word that's oft said.

Hey, V also stands for Volunteers. Now, make sure you live out the example that paint with your words. Don't be hypocritical.

So is that it?

There's a journey of learning, a journey of building.

Start with the willing, persist with your will, and dream big.

To be lived.

Processes

This thought occurred to me while on the loo: Why do we (my company) pay so much attention to details? Because we want the product and outcome to come out to be of a particular standard and quality.

Nit-picky? Fussy? Yes, with reason. Anal? Oh yeah, sure I gotta be. If I don't, someone above me will.

Don't expect handouts along the way, or live without outlaying any effort. Ditch the wrong beliefs and sow the seeds of faith.

Success, victory and breakthroughs come through hard, effective work and pushy persistence.

Seethe with righteous anger if you have to. Stamp on in authority. Live with vitality.

Be purposeful, absolutely so. So that you don't lose your edge and your dream.

Live--by the process you need to achieve the outcome you want.